My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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