I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
