I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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