were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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