Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
