scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
