So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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