i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
third nipple confirmed
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
