Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
