Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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