Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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