Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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