I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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