New invention idea: vibrating tampons
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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