so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
