we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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