I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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