glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
