Farmville is her only friend.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize