Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
