Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize