:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
