Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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