He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
