I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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