Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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