coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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