It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I could make wine with my vomit
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
