her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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