I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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