this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I'm passing your future prison.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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