With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
