so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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