Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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