Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize