She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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