I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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