We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
