please come you make the beer taste better
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
