Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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