I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize