there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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