Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
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