Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
