I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
