I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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