Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
