8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Do vagina's smell?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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