I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
