So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
