Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize
