on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize
