Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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